I Laugh With My Friends

I'm not going to lie here, damn, I told the world about my crushes, so I feel it's safe to confess this here: I like to laugh. A lot.

Yes, 'duh' you might say, but the truth is, I don't always laugh because something genuinely is funny. Laughing when someone is telling a funny story or a joke, is a powerful way to wordlessly tell them you appreciate them. I mean that's the key drive for humans to socialise, according to Carnegie. To be appreciated. So by laughing at someone's joke, you are actually saying 'I'm acknowledging you' (or something along those lines, right).

It's a good way to be seen as a friendly person. However I must disclaim here, before you start thinking that I'm laughing at your jokes purely to hoard friends, no I don't. I only laugh when I think there is the slightest potential that I could connect with you. I hope you value that.

On the other hand, I am kind of a people pleaser too, so that helps. However I only say that, because I know I am a people pleaser with limits - I would never let someone walk over me just because there's a puddle on the sidewalk.
Not my style.

I really think that making people genuinely laugh and enjoy themselves in one's company is an art, so when I do find a person, a friend who I feel comfortable to be around, and who makes me laugh, I instantly will want to be friends with you.

Maybe I should tell a story here, about why I'm friends with certain people, and how we became friends when we, dreadfully shy, started college. Yay? 

It was the first day of college in Chichester. More than one person was nervously hiding in the corner, aware that if they don't make friends today, they will end up being loners, sitting alone at lunch, or worse alone in the library.

That was not me. I can confidently say I have some experience in meeting people. 'Some' being the important word there, but that is another story, about how I came to England, started school and blah blah blah...

The point here is that I know who I want to approach, and don't usually lose time with people who I don't see as potentials. Therefore, when I came to my first ever college lesson, Spanish, and walked into classroom I decided to approach probably the tallest person there. Phoebe. 

Okay, the truth here is I kinda took a guess and hoped she was the person she was, as Adam, her older brother who I used to work with once mentioned that his sister is doing this course, the same year as I am and so I thought that was a good ice breaker, or...?

I am not sure what she thought of me the instant she saw me, but we generally became friends quite fast, I'd say. Phoebe, I know you're reading this, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong here :) 

I shall thank her for introducing me to her many funny friends from her school too, as I find these people genuinely fascinating. And so is Phoebe. She is one of those people that there doesn't go a day by that I haven't laughed at least a little, and I am very grateful for that. I swear she can make anything funny or even better, hilarious to a point others around think we belong to a special other place.

She is not the only one though (sorry) that makes me laugh.

Few lessons into college, and few awkward lessons into French, Conner and I shared our opinions on this language at college and bonded quite fast too. 

I remember the first time I spent couple of hours with him, I was waiting for someone else, so he was just an entertainment in the mean time, but man I don't regret it. 

This boy swears a lot, has weird thoughts and stories equally if not weirder! I adore his sense of humour, and put him in a room with Phoebe, or better sit them down at a Costa's table and take them to Domino's and you've got the perfect recipe for a hilarious afternoon. 

So this is how the current trio came around. We went for a pizza during our break. I guess that's a good reason to bond over, right?

We always joke around (aka they bully me for my accent and attempt to make me sound British), but I am pretty sure we equally need each other to make that college life more colourful - by the way guys, you still owe me a pizza trip ;)

If I could give a 'for instance' to kinda show you how hilarious our conversations are, I would, I swear, but I don't think that would be entirely appropriate right here, so that should give you a hint of what sort of things are said.

I think funny people have it. That first impression that is so important, in order to interest people, not necessarily romantically, but to make friends, to get to know someone. Charisma is it? I think that's what they call it. If I had to state what a charismatic person possesses, it would be the 'funny gene', definitely.

True enough, I don't think I have that 'funny gene' as those who know me might have noticed. Normally if you meet me, and in case I am not entirely sure about you I will be slightly awkward (or a lot) and quiet... it does improve though over time, I promise!

Not the point here though.

So is being able to make poeple laugh the ultimate ice breaker? And if so, is it possible to learn to be funny, or are you just born charismatic and funny?

Of course there are people who would disagree. People, like personal coaches, who teach people to be charismatic, and as much as I would love to be charismatic, is it natural? Or is it about tricking people into thinking that it comes to a person naturally?

Is that what we are about? About tricking others? Is it in our genes, or does it ensure diversity, as all of us will have a slightly different attempt at tricking others, and boom, individuality and uniqueness is born.

What do you think?



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